I want to run far, far away. Right now I really identify with Wolverine. Our lives are different but I see my emotions in his face. I wish I could have claws to slash and strength to break things, and then have no physical repercussions because my body would heal itself.
Tomorrow my husband is having a brain biopsy. They will drill a hole in his skull above his left ear and take out a small section of meninges (lining) and they can't help but take a small chunk of brain with it. The surgeon says it's no big deal. He will be in the hospital for 2 days and then he will have 3 weeks recovery at home. I'm worried because of his venous malformations on that side of his head. The surgeon assured me he will go around him. I don't understand how he will know where they are but I am trying to trust him.
I guess I am trusting him because I am going to take my husband to the hospital tomorrow for the surgery. My body is protesting. I have my own health issues and they are all screaming. My heart is racing, my muscles hurt. I feel like I am in flight mode. I want to run from the situation.
The reason we are doing this is to see why he has chronic, recurrent meningitis. It may be neurosarcoidosis. That could be good because it's treatable. But, part of me says it's bad because both of us having sarcoidosis is too much. I am hoping for the best. I just don't know what the best is.
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