Junior Achievement

On Friday May 20th I volunteered at the Junior Achievement city for Jefferson Elementary 5th graders. We had a great time. I worked with my niece Amy and our 3 kids ran Larry H Miller.

 There was a Maverik where we all ate. I loved all of the detail!

 Here's a picture of Amy and I before we got started.

 This is a picture of all the kids in front of City Hall at the beginning of the day.

 This is a picture of our CFO Diego advertising on KSL to try to improve sales.

I was going to delete this blog and start a new one. But then I opened it and said meh, why start over. I would like to be a little more anonymous. It's scary putting myself out there like that. So, what has happened since September? Well... I did get down to 169 pounds which is the highest number in the healthy weight range for my height. But around that time I just couldn't stand medifast a minute longer!!! So, I started eating everything in sight. A few months ago I started the whole 30. I did it for 6 weeks and got back down to 172. Then one day I went to JCWs and haven't gotten back on track since. Last night I weighed myself at the grocery store and I was 184.
Earlier this week I decided I don't want my blog to be about my weight anymore. I want to focus on more positive things. I love volunteering. I think I will start posting about that. It is something I am currently doing, not something I hope to achieve one day. I love it.
This morning I had an epiphany. I have had unrealistic expectations of myself as a Granny!!! I have 7 grandchildren and 2 on the way. The oldest one is 4. My mom is a a really wonderful Grandmother and Mother. She was always there for me when I was having my children. She cooked for us, babysat for us. She was in the room when they were born (except for the emergency c section). She cared for me and my kids after my c section. I was a single mom at the time. When my next child was born and I had remarried and moved to Utah she came and stayed with me for 2 months so she could take care of me. She was there for all of my brother, Jack's, children too. His wife was a stay at home mom and she and my mom formed a very strong bond. When my brother's wife died they all lived with her as they got used to the life change. The grandkids all call her Nanny.
Then there is me. I have had to work most of the time I have been raising kids. I cannot tell you how many times I quit my job because my kids needed me. I know it sounds irresponsible but I felt like not being there for my kids was irresponsible. I was actually out on disability part of the time because I just couldn't figure out the balance. I experienced a nervous breakdown. They are real. I really admire successful working moms. I finally got better at it but I feel like I missed so much. Everyone talks about the struggle of being a working mom but I have never heard anyone talk about the struggle of being a working Granny. I'm much better at working now. My kids are grown so I am learning to take care of myself. I'm learning that when I am too selfless it really doesn't benefit anyone. I am learning my truth of who I am. I will come back to that in another post. All of my grandchildren have been born in a different state than where I was living at the time. I was in the waiting room when my 6th grandchild was born and this last one I participated in via FaceTime. I always look for time & money to travel to where they are soon after they are born so I can see them. That involved a visit to Florida, Washington DC, Utah(when I didn't live here) and several trips to Idaho. I am having a hard time balancing who I think I should be with who I really am. What kind of Granny am I? Well, here is what I know so far... I like lots of hugs. I like to keep in touch and know what everyone is doing. I would love to have a close relationship with my daughters in law but I realize that we all work and live in different states. It is not realistic to expect what my mom had with my brother's wife. We can keep in touch and look for common interests. I like spending one on one time with my grandchildren, getting to know them and who they really are. That old saying is meaning a lot more to me now. "It's quality, not quantity." That is what I will remember when it comes to time with my family. They can be proud of me for different things, like having a cool job or going to college. They will me able to say..."My Granny goes to college!" Maybe they will be proud of my volunteer efforts. No matter what. I know they love me.

4 generations. My granddaughter, my daughter, me & my mom.

Medifast Day 9

Day 9
Weight 185
Glucose 135
I need to find a better way to take my pictures. I am not happy with them. The hardest part is still not snacking when I'm watching tv and not looking for comfort food when I am feeling sad or anxious.

Medifast Days 3 through 8

Day 8

Weight 185

Glucose 141

Body Fat 38.4%

Tummy 42.5 "

Neck 16 "

Chest 41 "

R Arm 15.5 "

L Arm 16 "

Rib Cage 37.5 "

Waist 36.5 "

Hips 40.25 "

R Thigh 23.5 "

L Thigh 23.5 

Day 7

Weight 185 pounds

Glucose 123 mg / dl woo-hoo!

Day 6

Weight 185

Glucose 138

temptations at work

Medifast Day 5

Weight 185.6 pounds

Glucose 140

Day 4

Weight 185.6

Glucose 133

Day 3

Weight 187.2

Glucose 130

Medifast Day 2

Yesterday was rough. I ate my first meal and then I went to Whole Foods to do my shopping for the week. I did not prepare. I thought I would be back by 2:30pm when I needed to eat but I didn't get home until 4pm. At 2pm I was in the store and felt like I was going to pass out so my husband convinced me to eat some samples. I had one corn chip with guacamole and he bought me some electrolyte water. I also had a diarrhea attack. I'm so glad he drove me so I didn't have to drive home. It is so difficult shopping for things I don't normally buy. But we got it done. I had to go to Bed Bath and Beyond to buy a kitchen scale because they didn't sell the meat in the exact portions I needed. I also had to go to Smith's for a couple of dressings that they didn't carry at Whole Foods.

This is a picture of yesterday's meal. It was delicious. I actually had a hard time eating everything.

Me today. I will be so glad when I don't look pregnant anymore.

Weight 187.2 lbs
Glucose 132

Medifast Day 1

So, my health has actually gotten worse instead of better. :( So sad. August has been a rough month health wise. I was at my doctor 2 weeks ago and she said that my diabetes was bad and that I needed to get my sugar down. She didn't want to give me more medication because I'm already taking so much. She said to eat absolutely no sugar. Do you know how hard that is? Believe me I've been trying since 2008. She also told me to eat Oatmeal, Apples, Pears and Beans. I can do everything except the pears. They are gross. I feel like I am eating sand when I eat a pear. I don't like the texture. But I said I would do what she said. A few days later I went to the eye doctor which should not be a big deal, right?! It ended up freaking me out!!! First I got progressive lenses so I can focus on different distances. He told me there is a freckle inside my eye we have to watch to make sure it doesn't turn into cancer. But the scary part was he found that I have diabetic retinopathy!!! That is what makes diabetics go blind. I am only 44 years old! He explained the sugar in my blood is so high that it is leaking from the blood vessels in my eyes. The good news is that it is not near my optic nerves. It is in the outer parts of my eye and he says it may be reversible.

I had lots of people at work giving me advice. One said that I should only eat protein, like meat and cheese. Since I have been trying to go vegan ever since I first saw Forks over Knives I thought that would be a pretty extreme shift. Another person I was introduced to by my manager had been doing Medifast. He got off all of his medications in 2 weeks and lost 45 pounds in 3 1/2 months. I was reluctant because the food did not look healthy or tasty and it is very expensive. But given all the bad news I had and that I hadn't been successful with Weight Watchers, PureTrim, Juice Fasts or a Vegan lifestyle I decided that this is my next effort.

Today is day 1.

This picture brings up some other issues. I have been in this house for over a year and my mirror is right where I keep all of my unpacked boxes. Maybe during this journey I will get my house in order.

Today is one of my best days since I became diabetic. I weigh 189.4 lbs. 38.7% body fat and My glucose is only 144.

Tummy 42.5"

Neck 16"

Chest 41"

R Arm 16"

L Arm 15"

Rib Cage 38.5"

Waist 38"

Hips 41"

R Thigh 24"

L Thigh 24"

Energy Profiling? Type 1? What is all this crazy talk????!!!!

I quit my job on July 1st and life has been a whirlwind ever since! Part of that is because my daughter called me one day and told me that she had been learning about energy types and thought I was a type 2.  (see www.myenergyprofile.com ) I said ok. I was in the process of moving to Utah so I told her I would learn more about it after I arrived. Several weeks later, before I left to catch a plane to visit my son she gave me a copy of Dressing Your Truth and told me to read it on the plane. I did. (see www.dressingyourtruth.com ) By the time  I returned I was sure I was a type 3. She showed me a video on you tube that explained that many type 1s with a secondary 4 and vice versa confuse themselves with type 3. I was thoroughly confused. I would tell myself I was a 1/4 but I didn't like it. My facial profiling was definitely much more type 1 than 3. I didn't see any 3 in my face. I sort of accepted it until we went to a club night. By the end of club night I was sure I was a type 2. Then in casual conversation with both Carol and Ann they said, "So, you're a type 1." (They assumed that I had already come to that conclusion myself. Carol told us not to ask what our type was. We need to figure it out ourselves.) I left very conflicted thinking that they know what they are talking about and that they were wrong at the same time. I decided to embrace it or at least try to. I get why it is a 30 day challenge it is a process. Here is a picture of me, Carol and my daughter at club night:

 On September 2nd I went to get my hair done. It was such an emotional experience. Here is my before picture:

Here is my after picture:

I don't know if you can tell in my face but I was not happy. I hated the hair color. I had her go much darker before I went home. I have to say that everyone at the salon and the store is so nice. Melissa stayed there to get my hair right until 7:30pm. They close at 6. She told me how since type 1s want everyone to be happy we sometimes have a hard time knowing what we want. 

This is me the next day trying to do it on my own:

I later realized that this shirt was type 3. Grrr. It just really weighed me down. By the end of the day I couldn't wait to take it off. But I like this hair color. I think I need my hair cut again to make my bangs shorter and to get more layers. I also wish I hadn't gone so short. But that is the way I learn. I have to see it on my head before I know if it will work or not.